Day After Day...

So much of motherhood (and parenting in general) can feel so repetitive. It's a struggle for me to find joy in the daily tasks, to not let exhaustion cloud the beauty of the moment. On this day I spent time with just my two kids and Dave. It was an hour where no one else in the world mattered and we were fully present in our surroundings..soaking up these precious moments with Mae and Owen. They both continue to teach me how to let go and embrace them as they are, embrace what life brings you. Being content with less, running around less, and realizing what you thought you wanted to do really doesn't bring fulfillment are a few other things I am being taught. Thank goodness we have these little ones in our lives to bring perspective to our complicated adult worlds!

Happy Birthday, Owen!

Owen is finally one year old! This year has flown by...yet with many long days and nights. Owen was thrilled with his first cupcake..red velvet with cream cheese frosting (and sprinkles compliments of Mae). Owen keeps us smiling as we watch him half crawl/half walk to the sandbox, as he digs in the garden, as he obsessively picks up leaves by the stem, and as he eats like a horse. (He tries to whinney like a horse, too!) Owen still loves animals with horses, dogs, and cows being his favorite. He has many loves in his life: dad, Mae's favorite stuffed toy Ted, his blankey, his new wolf, any and all food, his squeaky lamb, finding the moon in the sky, his dad's soccer ball, the red wagon we pull him in daily, food, crawling into Mae's room to wake her up from her nap, and his favorite part of the day is when his dad coming home in the evenings.
Thank you, Owen, for being our little boy...and thank you, God, for letting Dave and I be his mom and dad while on earth. Love you, boy!

Goodbye, Hoppy!

Sweet Hoppy. We had over a year of life with you. Mae and Owen LOVED bringing you carrots, visiting you in your hutch, and watching you hop around the house. A favorite memory was watching you jump into our fireplace while a fire was going! Luckily you survived! A crazy day for you was when you had 10 kids chasing you around the back yard during our spring party! Owen misses watching you through the cage but Noah will miss his little friend the most.
Thank you for being part of our family!

Mae Turns 3

Really? It is time for Mae to be three years old? Mae is really a 10 year old trapped in a 3 year old body. Not really since she loves princess dresses, baby dolls, and dancing...even though most of us gals still enjoy all those things throughout life. :) Mae is so full of life. These days all she wants is to be given devoted attention as she twirls in her dresses, plays with her stuffed animals, and pretends in her room. To capture her heart, one only has to be present, focused, and be authentic. She knows when you are bluffing. She is so aware that she now will make me walk over and look at what she is showing me, even though I say that I see it. Owen challenges her a bit. She now has to share her time and toys with him. Some days she wakes up and he does everything wrong, other days she is eager to share almost anything with him.
Mae and I still have lots of fun together, even though much of my energy is now being diverted to Owen. When I do focus and get down with her and involved in her play, I am transported back to my 3 year old self and find pleasure in diapering cabbage baby and saddling up plastic horses.
Thank you Mae for making me laugh, for preventing me from taking life too seriously most days, and for being my constant companion.
Happy Birthday!

Checking for Rain

This was the week earlier in the month that it rained almost everyday...oh, to have those days back again! Last night we shared a meal with our long time friends, the Young family. Troy and Stephanie, along with their four fabulous boys (Tristan, Coleman, Blake, and Timmy), are moving from Mississippi where they've been for at least 12 years. In August, the six of them are packing up and moving to Littleton, Colorado where they will begin their new life in the West...pursuing their dreams of opening a retreat of healing and rest for believers. The first step is seminary for Troy and then on to the mountains to set up this retreat. To witness this transition in their lives is really amazing. It reminds me that God is active in our lives and will lead us on great adventures, life changing journeys, if we learn to listen to His voice, act in obedience, and trust Him completely. Hooray for the Young Family!!
As Mae keeps tabs on the rainfall in Tulsa, I will be practicing being quiet and listening to God's voice in my life.

A New Relationship

As Dave and I were driving home from a fun dinner, I heard babbling coming from both sides of the back seat. Mae and Owen were 'talking' to each other...Mae reverting back to baby talk for Owen's sake. They both were smiling and fully enjoying their interaction! I could see Owen's arms wildly waving toward Mae and saw him straining forwards to get a better look at her. Mae was staring at him while she made funny faces as she talked to him. It really was adorable! Hopefully this was the first of many good and fun moments that occur only between the two of them.

Newly Wed

Our first photo together, besides the thousands of wedding photos we took! We were on our honeymoon in Belize. Today is our 6 year anniversary and tonight we watched our wedding video for only the second time since we've been married. Hoping it would be a delightful experience as we laughed and remembered that sweet day, I decided to bring us both down by getting extremely emotional over it all. On my wedding day there was a lot going on besides Dave and I, yet that is what I focused on. When I watch it again, I don't focus on Dave and I and instead I find myself feeling all the emotions that go with the 'other stuff' that was going on. My parents had recently separated and were divorcing, I was leaving an incredible family in Mississippi (the Youngs) and saying goodbye to that chapter of my life, and my mom's health was steadily declining. On top of that, to see both my mom and grandmother (who are now both deceased) brings so much longing from my heart. To be with them, to hear their voices, to be under their authority and guidance...I miss those times. I also found myself grieving over what could have been. My life with Dave is far better than that wedding day, by far. We have had many adventures and still do to this day! Yet I find myself wondering if I made wrong decisions on where to live, what jobs to take, etc. I'm at a point in my life that I'm realizing how quickly time passes. I may not have very long, I might have 60 more years, but either way I know I need to be living out of who God made me to be, or I'm wasting time. I fear that I am not and I'm not sure where to go from here...